WildCards
15-10-2006, 08:27 PM
It's an oldun and I'm sure it's been on here before but...
> A man in Wales buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.
>
> After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting
> pregnant, and phones a vet for help.
>
> The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.
>
> The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not
> wanting
> to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the
> sheep
> are pregnant.
>
> The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will
> lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.
>
> The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion
> that
> artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.
>
> So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the
> woods,
> has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.
>
> Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep.
>
> Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the
> first
> try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again.
>
> He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good
> measure,
> brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
>
> Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. "Try
> again" he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up again, does his
> thing,
> drive home, and falls listlessly into bed.
>
> The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out
> of
> the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are
> lying in the grass.
>
> No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is
> beeping
> the horn."
> A man in Wales buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.
>
> After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting
> pregnant, and phones a vet for help.
>
> The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.
>
> The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not
> wanting
> to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the
> sheep
> are pregnant.
>
> The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will
> lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.
>
> The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion
> that
> artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.
>
> So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the
> woods,
> has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.
>
> Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep.
>
> Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the
> first
> try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again.
>
> He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good
> measure,
> brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
>
> Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. "Try
> again" he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up again, does his
> thing,
> drive home, and falls listlessly into bed.
>
> The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out
> of
> the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are
> lying in the grass.
>
> No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is
> beeping
> the horn."