PDA

View Full Version : Dog Diary / Cat Diary



KiwiTT
07-06-2007, 05:06 AM
As seen in a dog's diary:

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!

As seen in a cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity...
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.
Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the
stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again
induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must remember to try
this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear in
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my
powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and how I may
use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.
The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return.
He is obviously a half-wit.
The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with
them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his
current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I have
patience, I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

Brunty
07-06-2007, 11:24 AM
Very accurate! Brilliant.

BraindG
07-06-2007, 12:28 PM
haha, i laughed out loud with this one, like it.. :iloveyou: