My Missus told me we couldn't afford beer anymore and I'd have to do without.

Then I caught her spending £65 on make-up, £250 on new clothes, £300 on gym membership, £75 on getting pampered at a salon.

And I asked how come I had to give up stuff and she didn't.

She said she needed all that to look pretty for me.

I told her that was what the beer was for...


...I don't think she's coming back